I really have to go :: Flash Writing

Things are shifting inside of me, feelings moving to one side, or another, and some things I think I'm just letting go of. I swore that this would be a year of change for me. I said it like a mantra, like a wish, like a promise to myself. It was different than a resolution, bigger, more true, because I kept it to myself, tucking it away. I may have said it now andagain, but the words were kept vague, grey-tinted, blurry. I did not even know myself what all the changes would be. I didn't want to know. I did not want to make lists that might sit there as a reminder, as expectation, as disappointment. No, I wanted it to be more natural than that. I wanted to see what change could be, what change might come.

You start all over again

When I was a young girl I collected Barbies, and other trademarked dolls, usually representing a movie or television character, like Princess Leia, all three Charlie’s Angels, or Cher. I had boxes of clothing for them, a bright pink jeep and a lemon yellow motor home, and the ultimate “dream house” which had cut out holes in the roof for my hands to reach in, but no stairs or doors to any of the rooms. I had a few “men“, too, Ken with his “real” looking hair and smooth “boy mound“, and Han Solo who had painted on hair, and the outlines of a muscular frame, but still no “boy parts“.

Close your eyes to what’s not there

He loved all the taste of her bad habits, cigarettes and whiskey straight. She loved the feel of mint on his breath, a blown kiss between her legs. They would shudder and shake, pressed together, trading whispered dirty words, and screamed sighs, as the night faded into nothing at all. Fade Into You :: Mazzy … Continue reading Close your eyes to what’s not there

that I’ve never forgotten

You Said Something (live) :: PJ Harvey "We lean against railings, describing the colors, and the smells of our homelands, acting like lovers. How did we get here, to this point of living? I held my breath, you said something."   Have you ever noticed the immense power of words? How something can be said, even … Continue reading that I’ve never forgotten