Belle and Sebastian Top 5 Music Obsessions

Top 5 Music Obsessions featuring Belle and Sebastian

Today’s the last day of April. Last days lead to first days. Last days are not goodbyes, but more like see you later’s. Last days are doors closing so others can open. Last days are wiping slates clean, writing out lists and wishes, and letting go so you can let new things in. And, last days are just like any other day sometimes, too. It’s all about perspective.

I’m feeling positive this week. I’m feeling good about things in my life. Most of them, at least. I’m feeling both motivated and accomplished. A month ago there were things I wanted to change, and they are changing. I’m changing them. I have a lot more work to do, and there are things that are not working in my life, but I see the progress. I feel it. I feel good. Even with the ebb and flow of anxiety, I am feeling (mostly) good.

Today’s Top 5 Music Obsessions feel it, too, I think. They feel good, or they make me feel good, at least. I played them all, off and on, all morning and afternoon. Turn them up loud and I hope you enjoy all 5 of them, too. You can stream on Spotify and YouTube – or just press play below.

Top 5 Music Obsessions – April 30, 2019

1. “There is an Everlasting Song” by Belle and Sebastian
from the album, How to Solve Our Human Problems (Parts 1-3) (2018)

Not on YouTube

“There is an everlasting morning near the sun.
It burns a hole in my heart,
makes me want to run.
And, I would run all day if they give me the choice.
I hear your voice,
I hear your voice,
I hear your voice.”

A 100% feel good song. Even melancholic tracks by B&S make me feel good. They always have, ever since I discovered the album If You’re Feeling Sinister, back in the mid-90s.

This is recent. Last year recent. Though I’m just discovering it now, the album(s), and the song. This is my first listen favorite.

It reminds me of falling in love. That first falling feeling. And, it reminds me of feeling that love long after the first fall. The way that it can be still big and bold and beautiful, if you let it. If you let your heart love like that.

For a long, long time I believed it to be fleeting. Never as good as in the beginning. But, I think differently now. I believe it doesn’t have to be that way. Though I fear, often it is just that – especially when the other person believes in the fleeting, and first rush love-spiracy.

You can’t love big for both people. You can try. But, it only works when both people show up, and believe.

2. “Sodajerk” by Buffalo Tom
from the album, Big Red Letter Day (1993)

“But if my patience,
were a spaceship,
high up in orbit.
Then I would rise here.
Hypnotized here.
Risen from where I sit.”

There isn’t a time when this song doesn’t remind me of two things: My So-Called Life, and working at Tower Records.

This song, and the band are synonymous with both – and with who I was in my life back then. Its like sonic ’90s time travel.


3. “Time is the Killer” by Rain Phoenix and Michael Stipe
from the EP, “Time Gone” (2019)

“Time is the killer.
Time is the killer.
Time is the mirror.
Time is the healer.
Time is the teacher.
Time is the killer.”

This is beautiful, heartbreaking, poignant, relevant, and everything I obsess over in a song.

I’ve always loved the duets that Michael Stipe does. Like with Kristin Hersh, Natalie Merchant, Syd Straw, Dashboard Confessional, this one, etc.

The rest of this EP is wonderful, too. Though this is definitely my favorite track. It says/sings a lot of the things I am feeling lately. It speaks/sings to mindfulness, to me.

4. “I’m On Fire” by Electrelane
from the album, Singles, B-Sides, and Live (2006)

“At night I wake up with the sheets soaking wet,
and a freight train running through the middle of my head.
Only you can cool my desire.”

Electrelane Top 5

How many people have covered Bruce Springsteen’s “I’m On Fire”? I feel like I could build a playlist with just covers of this song.

No matter how many I hear though, I never seem to get tired of it. I’m always crushing on every new version I find.

I love how this one feels/sounds like a ’90s riot grrrl clash with an ’80s new wave band…in the best way.

5. “Midnight” by Altered Images
from the album, Happy Birthday (1981)

“Somebody left their blood on my door.
Serial numbers 024.”


Speaking of new wave. One of my favorite new wave bands is Altered Images, and I’ve always enjoyed this track without actually digging in deep to the lyrics. They are actually very disturbing.

Part of me wants to go back to when this song was just something I danced to at clubs in the late ’80s, and earlier, in my teenage bedroom.

giphy (2)


She calls me April's fool as I fall into May's embrace

She calls me April’s fool as I fall into May’s embrace – A Playlist

She calls me April’s fool as I fall into May’s embrace
A Playlist

Listen on Spotify and YouTube

“Stayin’ Alive” by Lizzo
“You Wouldn’t Like Me” by Tegan and Sara
“Stutter” by Elastica
“Why Can’t I?” by Liz Phair
“Supercut” by Lorde
“Sleepover” by Hayley Kiyoko
“Fade Into You” by Mazzy Star
“i love you” by Billie Eilish
“Wicked Game” by Gemma Hayes
“Reasons Not To Die” (Demo) by Ryn Weaver
“Glory Box” by Portishead
“All Apologies” by Sinéad O’Connor
“Killer” by Phoebe Bridgers
“Past Life” by Maggie Rogers
“Friend Like Me” by Betty Who
“Hollywood Lawn” by Jenny Lewis
“Erase/Rewind” by The Cardigans
“White Flag” by Dido
“Do What You Have To” by Sarah McLachlan
“Ruin” by Cat Power
“Head Alone” by Julia Jacklin
“Cartoon People” by Billie Marten
“Post Love” by Kimbra
“Black Star” by Gillian Welch
“Seventeen” by Sharon Van Etten
“Raspberry Swirl” by Tori Amos
“Hounds of Love” by Kate Bush
“Don’t Tell Me” by Madonna
“Troubled By the Way We Came Together” by Natalie Imbruglia
“I Don’t Want To Wait” by Paula Cole

She calls me April’s fool as I fall into May’s embrace

The ABC's of Tori Amos

The ABC’s of Tori Amos

ABCs Tori Amos Header

The ABC’s of Tori Amos
A lyriquediscorde favorites playlist
A Monday Playlist

Listen on Spotify and YouTube

“Amber Waves”
“Baker, Baker”
“Doughnut Song”
“Enjoy the Silence”
“Frog On My Toe”
“Gold Dust”
“Hey Jupiter” (Dakota Version)
“Jackie’s Strength”
“The Power of Orange Knickers” (featuring Damien Rice)
“Liquid Diamonds”
“Muhammed My Friend”
“Northern Lad”
“Ode to the Banana King (Part One)”
“Playboy Mommy”
“Beauty Queen/Horses”
“Raspberry Swirl”
“Silent All These Years”
“Tear In Your Hand”
“Upside Down”
“Yes, Anastasia”
“Mr. Zebra”

The ABC’s of Tori Amos


Lizzo Truth Hurts Song of the Day

“Truth Hurts” by Lizzo

I’ve been buzzing about Lizzo since I heard her song “Juice”. I knew she was one to watch/listen to, and I’ve been doing just that – watching and listening to her. Watching the Netflix movie Someone Great last week I heard another Lizzo track, her new single “Truth Hurts”. I have been playing it off-and-on ever since.

“Truth Hurts” by Lizzo
Song of the Day

“Why men great ’til they gotta be great?
I just took a DNA test,
turns out I’m 100% that bitch,
even when I’m crying crazy.
Yeah, I got boy problems,
that’s the human in me.
Bling bling,
then I solve ’em,
that’s the goddess in me.”

The track inspired me to make a walking playlist for myself, and a second playlist for when I re-sign-up for the gym (when I can afford it again) because this song makes me want to move. It also has me singing-a-long loudly, while feeling all the empowerment the lyrics are full of. This is one of those songs that I want to blast loudly while hanging out with my best girlfriends. This song is meant for “dancing it out” with a best friend (think Cristina and Meredith dancing it out, early “Grey’s Anatomy”). It’s too bad that most of my best girlfriends live so far away.


For now, I’m going to shut my office door, press play, and turn the volume up. I may have to dance it out myself.

Influenced by Houston rap, gospel soul, and experimentalists like ANOHNI and Missy Elliott, Lizzo is a musical acrobat. The singer-rapper writes songs that, in equal measure, balance her unique sonic interests and lyrics that tackle womanhood and identity. (from Pitchfork)

Lizzo Truth Hurts

Lizzo, born Melissa Viviane Jefferson, is the founding member of indie hip-hop groups The Chalice, Grrrl Prty, The Clerb, Ellypseas, and Absynthe. She released her debut album, Lizzobangers, in 2013. Her second in 2015, called Big Grrrl Small World, and her most recent, Cuz I Love You, released this year.

“Truth Hurts” is her latest single, which is already making me want another new album.

Minnie Riperton Top 5 Music Obsessions

Top 5 Music Obsessions featuring Minnie Riperton

The last few days of April. Rain still coming and going in LA. “April showers” is a thing, but rain in Southern California, not so much. I’m getting accustomed to it though and will miss it when the rain is gone. Today is a day of change. New office in a new part of Los Angeles. We are in a space with more space, with exposed ceilings, and giant windows everywhere. I can stand up and see the ocean. This gifts me a sense of peace. An unexpected blessing. I should have known it would, to be honest. The sea and me, we go way back. The ocean has always been something magical to me, calming and hopeful, and full of peace and possibility.

Today’s Top 5 Music Obsessions are songs that have been bubbling up over the last few days. Songs I keep hitting repeat on. Songs that make me feel good, which is important right now. I’ve struggled a lot lately, more than I have since I was so much younger. I didn’t expect to ever be reacquainted with my twenties-anxiety, but it came back to me over the last year. I’m always one to find the good in things, but it’s been quite a struggle to find the good in all this anxiety. Today, as I was driving one thing, did occur to me…all this anxiety inspired my investigations into mindfulness, into meditation, healthy eating, walking, and breathing. Writing and music have always been tools, but these others are new to me – and they are helping my anxiety, along with some other internal, and external things.

It’s slow going. Any change is. But it’s been a gift to my life. So, I suppose, that is the good in the anxiety. It has led me to live more healthily, with more vulnerability and mindfulness. It is helping me be more awake, and alive.

The first track in today’s Top 5 is from Minnie Riperton. It’s a tune that recalls my childhood, reminding me of riding in my family’s light blue station wagon or lying on the floor in our living room listening to the music coming out of the bigger-than-me-at-the-time speakers. Next up is the perfect end-of-April song by the incredible Patti Smith. I feel like I’m always uncovering music of hers, and I’m grateful for that. Jennie Lawless is a new discovery singer that I recently added to a walking mix of mine. I can’t seem to get enough of this track of hers. Today’s 4th song is another one of Juliana Hatfield’s Olivia Newton-John covers. I really don’t think I’ll ever tire of hearing ONJ’s songs, by her, or by Juliana. Bedouine is this week’s newest discovery – discovered today on my way into work. It reminds me of 60’s music my mom used to play back in that car, and living room, I mentioned before.

Let’s have a listen to all 5. You can stream on Spotify and YouTube – or just press play below.

Minnie Riperton Top 5 Music Obsessions Header

Top 5 Music Obsessions – April 29, 2019

1. “Les Fleurs” by Minnie Riperton
from the album, Come To My Garden (1970)

“Ring all the bells,
sing and tell the people that be everywhere,
that the flower has come.
Light up the sky with your prayers of gladness,
and rejoice,
for the darkness is gone.
Throw off your fears,
let your heart beat freely at the sign,
that a new time is born.”

Minnie Riperton Top 5 Les Fleurs

This song seems perfect for a day of change, like today for me. It has a feeling of joy and hope to it. That said, after its recent use in the closing credits of Jordan Peele’s film, Us, there is something foreboding about it, as well. And relevant to the movie’s story (“…for the darkness is gone.”)

I first knew of Minnie’s music through her 70’s hit “Lovin’ You”, a track my late husband used to love for reasons he never truly explained (but that I credited to his own childhood). I also remember hearing “Les Fleurs”, and the album Come To My Garden growing up. I’m pretty certain it was among my mom’s large record collection.

Minnie is the mother of Maya Rudolph, a favorite actor/writer/comedian of mine. She died tragically from breast cancer, in 1979. At diagnosis, which was unfortunately late, her prognosis was dire. Nonetheless, Minnie continued touring and spoke out with the American Cancer Society.

2. “April Fool” by Patti Smith
from the album, Banga (2012)

be my April Fool.
you’re the only one.
Come on your rusted bike.
we’ll break all the rules.”

“April Fool” reminds me of my young adulthood. Being in my very late teens and early twenties. My first car. The freedom that came with it. The hope I tied to everything and everyone I met, even though my life should have shadowed me with jadedness and doubt.

It also reminds me of my younger life. My first bike. The freedom that came with that, too. Riding around the neighborhood. My clip on radio playing. Feeling the Summer breeze whip my hair back. Feeling like I could be anyone I wanted to. Feeling like I could be anyone but me.

3. “I Want To Believe” by Jennie Lawless
from the EP, Two Songs (2018)

“I shut out the part of my doubtful heart.
Shudder at the thought of it spreading out.
Impressionable me cannot let it spread –
I wanna keep my head.”

I stumbled on this song when I was putting together a walking playlist for myself, and it stuck out to me, feeling very relevant to how I am lately. Seeking my optimistic self that has been dimming lately. Resurrecting her. Breathing new life in my hopeful side.

“I Want To Believe”. I want to keep believing. I want to get back into seeing this world as a beautiful thing, and my life as something so very good. I’m tired of feeling so doubtful and negative. I need the light that’s always been so vital to me and my life.

4. “Have You Never Been Mellow” by Juliana Hatfield
from the album, Juliana Hatfield Sings Olivia Newton-John (2018)

“Have you never been mellow?
Have you never tried to find a comfort from inside you?”

JH ONJ Top 5

I’ve written a lot about Olivia Newton-John’s music, and what it meant to me as a young girl. She was one of my favorite things, and her songs are part of the DNA of me. I was beyond excited (understatement) when Juliana Hatfield (one of my favorites from my twenties) released a cover album of Olivia’s songs.

No matter how many times I play the album, I never get tired of the songs. Never. I just love them more. This morning, “Have You Never Been Mellow” came on and it felt so perfect for how I’m feeling today, and lately. My need for mellowness, for mindfulness, for calm, and for happy. I feel like I’m surrounded by so much negativity, in all aspects of my life, and its been very hard on me.

But, I’m taking back happy. It is a choice, even when the choice is hard and feels insurmountable. Maybe we can’t be happy all the time. I know we can’t. But, I do believe we can choose to see the good in things, repeat to ourselves what we are grateful for (or write them out), and realize that in so many ways we are lucky to be here, to be alive, to love, and be loved.

Optimism, mellowness, and love do not fix everything. Money seems to beat out all of those things, even love, as does worries about money. But, somewhere in each day, we should appreciate love. I try to appreciate it. Love. As well as music, movies, books, the weather and blue sky, and all the random things that make up a day. I try to appreciate that I’m still breathing, too. Life is short and fleeting. Shorter than any of us think. We don’t get today back. We don’t get any of these moments back. Not ever.

5. “Come Down In Time” by Bedouine
from the single, “Come Down In Time” (2018)

“Come down in time I still hear her say,
so clear in my ear like it was today.
Come down in time was the message she gave.
Come down in time,
and I’ll meet you half way.”

What a gorgeous Elton John cover.

I came across this today via the Discover Weekly Playlist from Spotify. Bedouine’s cover of “Come Down In Time” was an insta-obsession. I kept hitting play, over and over again.

Bedouine is the name of Azniv Korkejian’s musical project. It is a take on the word Bedouin, meaning a nomad, or wanderer. Azniv is a bit of a Bedouin herself. She was born in Aleppo, Syria, grew up in Saudi Arabia, and then moved to the US when her family won a Green Card Lottery. Since then she’s lived in Boston, Houston, and now LA.

If you could go wandering today, where would you go?


Top 5 Music Obsessions – Week of April 29, 2019


Pete Yorn Top 5 Music Obsessions

Top 5 Music Obsessions featuring Pete Yorn

Today’s music (so far) has included a lot of Pete Yorn songs, including a playlist of lyriquediscorde’s alphabetized favorites of his. That’s what happens, I suppose, when you wake up with a song and artist singing in your head. This PY day includes a Top 5 Music Obsessions track, one that was the first Pete Yorn songs I ever heard.

From there the Top 5 play-list goes to Dramarama’s ode to Earth Day. Though it says April 21st in the song, today is the official Earth Day (April 22). I remember when there used to be Earth Day festivities in Fullerton, back in the ’90s. It was at one of these that I heard Dramamrama perform this song live.

Next up is a track off of Ride’s 1992 album, Going Blank Again. I’ve been digging into Ride’s music lately, and this one is my current obsessive favorite song of theirs.

I stumbled on this LA-themed song (I love songs about Los Angeles) from The Church on one of this week’s Spotify Daily Mixes. This track was immediately filed in my ever-evolving collection of LA and California song. This track, I had to play about 5 or 6 times already this morning – a good indicator of a Top 5 Music Obsession Song!

Last, but definitely not least, is a favorite-music-obsessed song of mine from the early ’80s. Yaz and Alison Moyet’s voice just slay me and this track always pulls at my heart and emotions, every single time I press play – whether back in 1982, or today.

So, let’s press play now, shall we? And give all 5 of Today’s Top 5 Music Obsessions a listen. Be sure to turn the volume up.

Top 5 Music Obsessions – April 22, 2019

Listen on Spotify and YouTube

Pete Yorn Top 5 Music Obsessions Header

1. “Life On a Chain” by Pete Yorn
from the album, musicforthemorningafter (2001)

“I was alone.
You were just around the corner from me.”

PY Top 5

“Take a listen to this, you’ll love this guy,” was the words of my late husband back in 2001. We’d been married a year and had made a crazy move to a state we’d only stay in for nine months. We were unpacking boxes and exchanging nervous looks back-and-forth, the anticipation mixing itself up with a hefty dose of anxiety, the stuff that big changes tend to bring.

He’d went to run an errand and stumbled upon a record store (always a find when in a new town) and picked up this album. He’d played it in the car on the way home and run in, excited, to share it with me. I can still remember that first moment, that first listen, and the first crackling sound of “Life on a Chain”.

That was the first time I heard the song. And yes, he was right, I fell hard for the album, and the song, right then and there. This track will always be one of my all-time favorite songs, from one of my all-time favorite albums.

2. “What Are We Gonna Do?” by Dramarama
from the album, Vinyl (1991)

“It’s April 21st,
and everybody knows today is Earth Day,
Merry Christmas, Happy Birthday to whoever’s being born.
And now I’m trying hard,
to think of something meaningful and worthy,
kind of earthy,
to make everybody ask themselves just
what are we doing here?
And what are we doing to her?
I don’t know.”

Dramarama Top 5

It was Earth Day. 1993 or 1994, I believe. We sat in the corner with our arms draped around each other as the singer (John Easdale) walked by. He stopped to talk to us, said he wished us well, and we did the same. When he sang this he said, “to the couple in the corner who still believe.”

Dramarama was one of our first shared loves. One of the biggest ones. It’s hard to separate our memories with the songs. I don’t think I will ever be able to.

I don’t listen often. But, I had to play “What Are We Gonna Do?” today. Earth Day memories. Its a great track.

Turn this one up to LOUD.

3. “Leave Them All Behind” by Ride
from the album, Going Blank Again (1992)

Just to see,
we’ve got so far to go,
until we get there –
just let it flow.”

Ride Top 5

Back in the 90’s I somehow missed the ride with Ride. I knew who they were, had friends who were big fans, and yes, I knew the song “Vapour Trail”, but for some reason, I’d never dug in and listened to them.

They’ve been on my back burner, listen t this, get to it someday list for a long time. Years really. I’m finally on the Ride-ride, and I’m loving it. This song, “Leave Them All Behind”, the first track on Going Blank Again is my big Ride-obsession right now.

Do you have a favorite Ride track?

4. “Laurel Canyon” by The Church
from the album, Further/Deeper (2014)

“All those times we parted,
all those times we saw it through.
Couldn’t finish what I started.
I was diminished without you.”

The Church was one of my favorite bands in the ’80s. So many songs of theirs from that era I love so much. To be honest, though, I’d not followed the band past that.

I stumbled on “Laurel Canyon” through a Spotify Playlist, and became immediately obsessed with it. Not only is it a song about California/Los Angeles (an obsession of mine – music collecting wise), but it has all the aspects, sounds, and sensibilities that I always loved about The Church.

Now its time to play catch-up with the music of theirs I’ve missed.

5. “Only You” by Yaz
from the album, Upstairs at Eric’s (1982)

All I needed was the love you gave.
All I needed for another day.
And all I ever knew,
only you.”

Speaking of the ’80s, Yaz and “Only You” are definitely on my favorite ’80s forever song list. This song, sad and beautiful, heartbreaking and love-song-ish, always makes me feel so many things. Sometimes the song makes me cry. Sometimes it spreads surges of warmth through my veins. And, sometimes it just has me singing-loudly-a-long.

I love Alison Moyet’s voice. So much.

Top 5 Music Obsessions – Week of April 22, 2019





The ABC's of Pete Yorn a lyriquediscorde favorites playlist photo by Jim Wright

The ABC’s of Pete Yorn

A new Playlist series starts with a lyriquediscorde favorite, Pete Yorn. The ABC’s of lyriquediscorde favorites – songs in alphabetical order for you to enjoy. For this week’s Monday Playlist lyriquediscorde is sharing the first one in the series.

photo by Jim Wright

The ABC’s of Pete Yorn
A lyriquediscorde favorites playlist
A Monday Playlist

Listen on Spotify and YouTube

“All At Once”
“Crystal Village”
“Don’t Wanna Cry”
“For Nancy (‘Cos It Already Is)”
“The Good Advice”
“Iguana Bird” (with Scarlett Johansson)
“Kellen Winslow”
“Long Time Nothing New”
“The Man” (with Natalie Maines)
“Never My Love”
“On Your Side”
“Pass Me By”
“She Was Weird”
“Turn of the Century”
“When You See the Light”

The ABC’s of Pete Yorn


Pete Yorn Just Another Song of the Day

“Just Another” by Pete Yorn

“Just Another” is track 3 off of Pete Yorn’s debut album, musicforthemorningafter, one of my favorite songs off of one of my favorite albums.

I woke up early this Monday morning with it singing in my ears, the song a leftover from a dream I was having, I think. Though it’s all so hazy in that not quite remembered way that dreams sometimes are. No matter the contents or context though, the tune seemed to be vying to be today’s Song of the Day.

So I’m obliging (and singing-a-long).

“Just Another” by Pete Yorn
from the album, musicforthemorningafter (2001)
Song of the Day

“You were lying wide awake in the garden,
trying to get over your stardom,
and I could never see you depart us
and you’re my baby.
You’re just another girl.”


To me, “Just Another” has always been about taking someone off a pedestal to really love them. The song, to me, captures that moment when the initial rush of attraction passes and two people come together and see each other a more realistically. That place where I think true love begins. I also sometimes picture a story where someone “out of reach” lets down his/her guard to connect with another, like Daisy and Jay Gatsby (“The Great Gatsby”), if they both weren’t so awful – or maybe despite it.

The song also reminds me of a short story I wrote about a record who falls in love with the girl who owns it.

musicforthemorningafter pete yorn

“Just Another” (live) by Pete Yorn

Stay tuned later today for a Pete Yorn lyriquediscorde favorites playlist, and the story about the album who fell in love with a girl, inspired by this song, and the album, musicforthemorningafter.

Donna Missal Top 5

Top 5 Music Obsessions featuring Donna Missal

This week has been rougher than the last, which I didn’t think would be possible. I woke up Monday morning with this hopefulness and peace, but it was quickly cut up into pieces as unforeseen stresses hit me. Then the fallout. I’m not handling stress and emotions well, and there have been consequences. I feel very alone.

Music is helpful. It’s not doing enough, but its something. It’s helping me hold it together, though I’m not doing that well either. All I can seem to do is go numb. But at least I stopped crying, and the panic has subsided. Sometimes you have to shut down for a while.

Today’s Top 5 Music Obsessions start out with a new musical discovery. I found Donna Missal via a friend’s Instagram story, where she was playing an album of hers. This track hurts but also feels relevant and comforting right now.

Next up is another new single off the upcoming Big Thief album. This one is so lovely. I can’t wait to hear the whole album.

Brendan Perry’s “The Captive Heart” came on after I was listening to today’s Song of the Day (Peter Murphy’s “A Strange Kind of Love”). I don’t think I ever delved into his 1999 album, Eye of the Hunter, but I’m doing just that today. Better late than never.

Yoko Ono, along with The Apples In Stereo (remember them? I’d almost forgot) have this keen collaboration that I’d never heard before. Thank you, Spotify Discovery for the introduction. This is a wonderful love song. Honest, realistic, and pure.

Last, but not least, is an epic number by Rufus Wainwright. Its been too long since Rufus and I shared audio space. I think it may be time to get reacquainted and do a Rufus-album-refresh.

Let’s give them a listen, shall we? While I try to breathe and wrap a blanket of numb (and music) around me.

Turn these 5 up loud. You won’t regret it.

Top 5 Music Obsessions – April 9, 2019

Listen on Spotify and YouTube

1. “Get Well” by Donna Missal
Pre-new-album single (2019)

“And maybe if we take some time,
to understand the weight we’ve felt,
if we could both apologise,
maybe we would both get well.”

Donna Missal Top 5 Music

This one stings but feels familiar, too. I’m tired of fighting. I’m tired of pain between us, instant defensiveness, swallowed resentments, and bad days every three days. Something has to change.

I know I can’t control anyone else but me, so change has to be with me, at least for me. For them. And for us. Someone has to take steps to change. Right now, it’s going to be me. I don’t want to hurt like this anymore.

If we are what we’ve claimed to be, we will make it to the other side. If not, then we were never meant to be. But this kind of pain, it isn’t meant to be. So we need to leave it behind. I’m going to leave it behind.

2. “Cattails” by Big Thief
Pre-new-album single (2019)

“And you don’t need to know why when you cry.
You don’t need to know why.”

I like this one even more than the first pre-album-single that came out.

I’m enthralled with Big Thief, and this upcoming new album is sure to be one of my favorites of 2019. I can already feel it.

I remember cattails from when I lived in Michigan, and when we drove cross-country to move there. I miss it. I’d love to take another trip across the country, but this time for adventure, and for writing inspiration.

3.”The Captive Heart” by Brendan Perry
from the album, Eye of the Hunter (1999)

“But then if I close my eyes,
I can see you standing there.
Your face in permanence smiles,
your lips a chalice.”

Brendan Perry Top 5

Full of gothy, esoteric, dreamy dark goodness. I forgot how much I enjoy Brendan Perry’s voice. I need to dig in deeper to this album, and maybe do a Dead Can Dance revisit.

It’s been far too long.

I need to do a Lisa Gerard revisit, too. Her voice always “slayed” me, in the best way.

Do you have a favorite Dead Can Dance, Brendan Perry, or Lisa Gerard song? Album?

4. “Nobody Sees Me Like You Do” by Yoko Ono, featuring Apples In Stereo
from the album, Yes, I’m a Witch (2007)

“I see your face with a trace of life,
being a wife and a woman.
If I ever hurt you, please, remember,
I wanted you to be happy.
Is there anything I want more,
More than your trust and understanding?”

Blame it on being raised in a big Beatles household, and then having my first marriage be with a John Lennon/anti-Yoko/blame Yoko man, but I never let myself know Yoko until recently.

Her poetry, songs like this, and the album it comes from, are all reason enough to have made the effort. I’m embarrassed that it took this long.

This is near perfect love song, especially because it doesn’t dance away from imperfection.

Its relatable and real, with a dash of melancholy, just the way I like my love songs, and love stories.

5. “Go Or Go Ahead” by Rufus Wainwright
from the album, Want One (2003)

“Forget about the ones that are crying.
Look in her eyes,
look in her eyes.
Forget about the ones that are crying.
Go or go ahead.”

Rufus Wainwright Top 5

This is an epic song. The stuff of stadiums, and big rock albums. The stuff of Freddie Mercury and Queen.

It makes me want to hear Rufus cover Queen (maybe he has already. If you know of it, share please).

I love the build. The slow start, the stirring middle, the emotional climax. Powerful, full of feeling, epic and BIG.

Ready Freddie



Peter Murphy Song of the Day

“A Strange Kind of Love” by Peter Murphy

1989 was a tricky year. 20 years old. The aftermath of 19 still fresh on my insides, and outsides. I was living life like there was no tomorrow while carrying scars from all my yesterdays, ones that were recent, and ones from my childhood. I wasn’t jaded though. Not yet. Maybe I should have been.

I am becoming so jaded now.

Today’s Song of the Day is from 1989. I listen and feel that self again. I’m envious of how hopeful she was, despite all the things that had happened. I’m envious at how much she believed in the future, in love, and in understanding. At least I still have the music she had. I’m grateful for that. And that I keep myself open for more music. Always more music.

But, for today, I’m looking backward. Pulling a song from 20-year old me’s collection. One of her favorites.

“A Strange Kind of Love (Version 1)” by Peter Murphy
from the album, Deep (1989)
Song of the Day

“This is no terror ground,
or place for the rage,
no broken hearts,
whitewash lies.
Just a taste for the truth,
perfect taste choice and meaning.
A look into your eyes.”

Peter Murphy SOTD

I was up most of the night last night in conversation with myself. My emotions have been so raw lately. My self-esteem at the lowest its been since my late 20’s. Anxiety and fear holding most of the cards, insecurity and doubt and deep sadness holding the rest of the deck. I know I need to make some major changes, but I don’t know how to anymore. So, for now, I’m putting my walls back up. I have to do something. I can’t survive like this. And I see the damage it’s causing all around me.

When people who you love, who say they love you, look at you so differently, have so little patience, and so much anger and disdain, well you know it’s not good. When you fight more than not fight, when things change too fast, too soon, well you know it’s not good. And when your children worry about you, openly, and say you are different, that you aren’t doing the things you used to, that you always seem so unhappy, well you know it’s not good.


For now, the walls come up and I shut down. At least until I feel okay again, that I can trust being open again, that I can keep my emotions in better check again.

If I don’t do this I will get sick again. I already am headed that way, and I won’t let that happen again.

And, if I don’t do it I will drown in tears.

I can’t cry anymore.

I just can’t.

So walls, while I try to rebuild, sort out what I need to do, and heal. Walls and music.

Always music.

“A Strange Kind of Love” (live) by Peter Murphy

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