Me and my anxiety are going steady. She gave me her class ring to wear around my neck. To wring my own neck with. To stay everlasting and true. She invited depression over for dinner. To Netflix and chill. To join us in bed without my consent. This thing is getting dysfunctional, my dear. My therapist asks if I like to dance. I think back and remember. Boots and black eyeliner. Fishnets and speed most nights of the week. Yes, I say. I used to love to dance. I was different then. Less choked and chained. I was everybody else’s girl but hers. Mostly. She lurked in the shadows. Waiting. Watching me drink her down. I saw her eyes in the spinning. You were meant for me. But this morning I say fuck back to the shadows. Open the window. Squint at the sun. Turn up the volume and go.

“You got what you been asking for.
You’re so policy free and,
your fantasy wheels and everything you think,
and everything you feel –
Is alright, alright, alright, alight, alright.”

“Deceptacon” is the opening track to Le Tigre’s self-titled album. I love a good opening track, especially the kind that pull you right in, and engage you. Le Tigre references Barry Mann’s song from 1961, “Who Put the Bomp (in the Bomp, Bomp, Bomp)”, making changes to the lyrics to be “We took the Bomp from the Bompalompalomp”. This reimagining/referencing sparked an infringement law suit by Mann that was settled in 2021.

I needed a song to dance to, and scream-sing-a-long-to today and this was the first to pop in my mind. It did the trick.