Last night was wonderful. I can feel us working our way back to how we were, finding us again. I can feel us both trying. Last night some things came into focus. Realizations of how significant the changes have been, how big they really are, and it helped to shift my perspective. I know that some of what has upset and worried me has been rooted in my own insecurities and fears. Not everything. I do have some valid worries, but most of it was my own fear. I feel so much better now, so much clearer. I feel like I got my hope back last night.
This morning has had some bumps. Its hard to see someone I love hurt, especially when there is nothing I can do to help. All I can do is hang on tighter, love through it, and be there to listen and support.
It’s August 1st. I love first days, new starts, blank pages, and beginnings. I think this is going to be a brilliant month. I really, really do.
Top 5 Music Obsessions – Monday, August 1, 2018
1. “September Song” by Agnes Obel
I fell for this song when I heard it in “Big Little Lies”. Today it feels peaceful, hopeful, calm. It feels like the best audible way to start off the new month of August.
I really do think it is going to be a wonderful month.
2. “My Finest Hour” by The Sundays
“And I keep hoping you are the same as me.”
I think we are both the same and different, and I think the blending of the two is like a mixtape. We are music, harmony, and discordance (in the best way), and I never want to stop listening to us.
3. “Hand On Your Heart” by José González
“Well, it’s one thing to fall in love,
but another to make it last.”
It takes time and work and attention and care to make love last, and when it is right and true, every moment of it is worth it. I know we are worth it.
Also, I tend to forget about José González. He really has a beautiful voice, and beautiful, melancholic songs. I love the acoustic guitar in this track.
4. “Go Easy” by Ryan Adams And The Cardinals
“I will always love you.
I will always love you.
So, go easy on yourself.”
Oh, Ryan. You always have a song that fits. Always.
I wish love was enough to take the pain away, to make someone you love see themselves the way you see them, to be able to heal things from the past, and things from the not so past. It isn’t something that can fix, but I’m going to keep loving regardless. More and more each day.
5. “Some Day Soon” by Alexi Murdoch
“And, as I dream I’m falling down.
The world moves without a sound.
I’m lost as sure as I was found.
The sun comes up without a sound.”
The lyrics above remind me of sunrise, of mornings waking from fitful, insomniac laced sleep, and the hope that comes from the silence of the morning. Music will replace those silences, but before that, there is a sense of peace. I wish I could bottle it up, a silent morning allixer, to apply when needed.
Top 5 Music Obsessions – Week of July 30, 2018