“It’s all right for a woman to be, above all, human. I am a woman first of all.”
You Are You Are (live) :: Lucy Schwartz
Originally from the EP, Keep Me
just out of reach
‘Cause I don’t know you at all.”
The view from the room of the non-descript hotel, the kind you would find by the airport in any big city, is a vast array of nothingness. She shivers from the air pumped in to mask the humidity of daytime, to cool the sheets and the days between. How she wound up here is still fuzzy, the pounding of pressure at her temples and twists in her belly a sure sign that decisions were made after drinking.
She drinks too much lately.
Her Sister’s pearls still dangle, colliding with protruding bones, reminding her of something borrowed from someone blue. He wore a ring he claimed to be a souvenir. He is wearing it still, tangled up and drifting off into some other place. Sleep the peace maker, their ship of denial. She tiptoes across the room, away from the window, looking for all her missing pieces. For a moment she closes her eyes, the room becomes one of first moments together, celebratory, monumental; honey hanging low from the moon.
She will forget to remember she was ever here.
He stirs and sits up, asks her to come back to bed, to come back to him. She shakes her head, soundless, wordless, searching for an easy escape. She could become the other side of the pillow, the reason for late night alibis, his point of indiscretion. She is used to being used that way. His smile is warm and her skin so very cold. She grows weary of doing what’s right.
She aches from the fine line walked towards perfection.