Then it fell apart

The Bourne Identity (2002)

This movie, oh my, this movie, I have so many feelings attached to this movie. It is bittersweet to me, and not because of anything about the movie itself, but because it ties back to a boy who referred to me as a “Bourne” because what we had together was kept a secret. And sometimes it was smoldering, and sometimes the secret seduction made it exciting, but mostly it left me feeling invisible, unknown, and it all became very lonely.

I took the role at first, though. There is ever that temptation to play at something you are not, to don a cloak and mask of a girl you may have admired from afar, with traits so different from your own. For awhile you believe the game, but it is that at the core, no matter the words I love you exchanged. Stripped apart and open, it is all just a game. I was always losing though, I was always running to catch-up, or running to get away.

The action hero is often the most tragic of characters.

Extreme Ways :: Moby

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